Meerkats and Perinatal Mental Health: What is the one thing I do when meeting some-one who is depressed or anxious?

It’s help them to calm their brain.

Picture a meerkat, up on the tips of his feet, eyes and ears peeled for danger. Red Alert. The meerkat is on patrol for the night. His brain and nervous system are hypervigilant, sensitive to all dangers, out to protect his clan.

Now picture the other miakats (that’s how I like to spell it!). They are asleep. They are warm and curled up, maybe cuddling up to a fellow miakat. They feel safe. They feel relaxed. They are resting and reenergising for the next round of activity.

They swap. Once the patrol miakat has done his patrol, he can rest, while some-one else takes over patrol duty.

The problem with anxiety and depression, is that the brain’s alert/danger system is stuck to “on”, leading to exhaustion. This alert/danger system shows itself in the inability to sleep well, the constant worrying about whether you are good enough, or whether your baby is healthy enough, or whether other people are talking about you, constant restlessness mixed with tiredness, irritability, and so on.

So, the first thing I do when I meet some-one who is depressed or anxious, is help their brain to switch from the alert/danger system, into the calm/relaxed system. I relax them in session, and then I give them a relaxation MP3 to listen to every evening as they go to bed. It’s like a sleeping tablet that has no side effects. It’s like a respite for the brain, from that constant struggle. It’s the start of things getting better for them.

Mia Scotland

Clinical Psychologist

http://www.yourbirthright.co.uk.

“I’m scared I’m going to harm my baby…”

What do you say when you hear the words “I’m terrified that I’m going to harm my baby”

Those words are ones that would be hard to say if you’re a mother. But if you’re a professional, be it a midwife, a health visitor, a doula or a counsellor, they can be hard to hear too. Those words represent an ultimate taboo.  A mother wanting to harm her own baby…..

But just wait a minute. If you are very astute, you will have spotted my deliberate error there. Can you see it? They are not the same thing. “I’m terrified I’m going to harm my baby” is not the same as “I want to harm my baby”.

If you hear a mother say “I’m terrified I’m going to harm my baby” the chances are she is suffering from an anxiety disorder, and she is not a danger to her baby. She is about as dangerous as some-one with fear of heights, who stands near(ish) a cliff and says “I’m terrified I’m going to jump off”.  You wouldn’t call the crisis team in this instance would you? Instead, you might say “no you’re not, you’re just scared”. It’s the same with mothers. If a mother is anxious (and especially if she is suffering from perinatal or maternal Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) then she might talk about suffocating her baby, but she can be reassured that she isn’t mad or bad, she is scared.  And of course, if you make the mistake of reacting like she is mad or bad, and call the crisis team, you certainly aren’t going to ease her anxiety!

To find out more about perinatal mental health problems, come to my workshop for birthing professionals on Friday 10^th June 2016. For details, click here 

Mia Scotland, Author of “Why Perinatal Depression Matters” and Perinatal Clinical Psychologist.